I need new strategy.
I need new tactics.
I cannot be check-mated by a 4.5 yr old. Grrr!
***Previously, I have naively thought I will never be using certain words in my motherhood career. Words like:
a. Listen to me. I am your mother.
b. Fine. Don't listen to me.
c. Don't ask why. Just do it.
d. Because I said so.
e. How dare you?
f. NO! Just no. Don't ask why.
Currently, I spit these words like a child spits peas . Very often and very unhealthy. To top it off, I have a perpetual "WT..." look. I scowl like I am constipated. Very often and also very unhealthy.
You would too if you listened to him talk. Like this:
Him: *pouring out some Smarties into a bowl* You tell me when to stop eating. But not now.
Me: Okay. When?
Him: *starts munching* Not now.
Me: Okay. *starts FB-ing*
(Few minutes passed. He sauntered to the sink and placed the empty bowl in it.)
Me: You finished everything? I thought you were supposed to leave some.
Him: You didn't tell me to stop. Next time tell me to stop.
That's when my face became constipated. That's when I heard an imaginary "check-mate!" Helloh! One moment of FB-ing, and he ate my 'pawn'?
Then again, it's only Smarties- matchbox size. I should just chill. It's not like he eats them and his teeth drop off there and then.
I know. I'm so contradicting.
Do excuse me. I am just trying to live another day without blowing a blood vessel, okay??
Now, back to the list on top. I should pick (e) "HOW DARE YOU?" in a shituation like this, don't you think?
I'm so losing my mojo. *gasp*
Duuk...duuuk...duuk...(my head hitting the wall)