Sunday, September 18, 2011

When to shut the gap

The other day, Gooly spent half a day at a friend's place. Bless her, she already has 3 kids, and is still willing to take Gooly in (yep, its a refugee camp there!)

As usual, that night we have a post mortem session. Ya, we do that all the time, checking our kids' (mis)behaviours during our absence. Very often we just end up with one theory - that we are both crazy mothers anlysing every thing pertaining to their behaviors (including why do kids dig their nostrils and leave traces of evidence on the wall) but that's another story.

So that day, Gooly has commented something about my friend's child being a weak reader.

In my book of manners (yet to be published), that is an offence, under section 2/3A, that warrants a serious punishment - The Torture of The Long Winded Lecture.

To begin, I asked why he said that. Duh! Not like he had a reason, and also not like any reason can justify the uncalled for comment.

As expected, he gave me a blank look. And then he kinda, in a way explained that he was just saying it, not knowing that it may hurt his friend's feelings. A very typical characteristic of the xy chromosomes species.

So i asked, "How would you feel if someone say that about you?"

"But i read well. So its not true. So i will just ignore it."

*hyperventilates*

"Ok, what if somebody said you are fat?"

"I will just pretend I didnt hear it."

*burst a vessel*

"Ok, what if they teased that you are a slow runner?"

"But I AM slow! I just have to try harder!"

*pengsan*

Ok, granted..all his responses are what i have taught him - the art of having deaf ears.

But now what i really want to teach is how to shut the gap. So I explained about positive and negative remarks. How some words make one feel good, and how some are just uncalled for. And we practised a whole list of adjectives..

pretty - clap clap
fat - zip the mouth
clever - clap clap
lousy - zip the mouth

..and so forth.

Anyways, his friend was gracious enough not to feel offended. Kids are like that. They don't take offence easily. I wonder when they grow up to be grumpy and calculative and easily angered.

Ah...analyzing again, eh? Told you I am anal- crazy. Anal as in analyzing..

2 comments:

tasy said...

What kind of a friend is that?? I would have told her son to buck up on his reading and stop complaining that people are saying nothing but the truth! (btw, you are not talking about my son, are you?)

goolypop said...

u got three kids meh?

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