Many times when a child misbehaves, I hear the parent says :
- oh she's tired.
- oh she's not feeling well
- oh she's cranky
- oh she's the middle child
- oh she just had a baby sibling
- oh she's hungry
- oh she's young still
- oh her pet turtle just died
...and whatever other 'ohs' they can think of. And voila, all the tantrums or rudeness are justified.
Ok let me say this slowly and carefully.
Is.....your....child....a ...baby....? (ok, shit..this is clearly not working. My brain works like a bullet train. And I have a cute bum to wipe (not mine). Chop! Chop! Let's get this over quick!)
Ok, here's my thought. When your child is old enough to verbalise, she can LEARN to tell you her problems without crying or whining. Deal with the tiredness, sleepiness, hunger or whatever that's bugging her with a SOLUTION, not with another problem (crying wastes more energy and make you even more tired lor, duh!).
The other day, I met a girl who's rather aggressive. She shoved another kid for the chair she "reeeeeaaaalllly" wanted because it matched with her blue blouse. *roll eyes*. (Oh, she's wearing blue, that's why she pushed the boy cos she's wearing blue. See what I mean?Am I the only thinking how absurd this sounds. FYI, I repeated the "reason" on purpose to see if it makes better sense. Nope, it still doesn't!) Another time she scolded the maid because oh, that's what maids are for (ok, I made this up :p).
And then the parent proudly concluded, "My girl won't be bullied. She's tough." Well, here's news, mama - she is the one bullying! Stop giving her excuses to behave like crap. No, let me rephrase...stop giving her the license to ill treat others. She was never bullied before, and there isn't a need for this aggressive behavior to protect herself. If we all behaved in a civilized manner, we don't need these haughty shields, really.
And isnt it tiring to bring up a child in a hostile manner. The world is quite a beauty if you believe so. Vice versa, it's hell if that's what you think it is. (if it is the latter to you, why choose to bring a baby to this earth, eh? *puzzled*)
Some parents are in denial..some are protective. Some even say it's love, thus allowing this ..uhm..freedom to uhm...express themselves *cough* Well, there is a gargantuan difference between liberation and rudeness.
If you really love your child, dare to discipline. Next chapter, how to discipline......jeng jeng jeng...(kakaka....as if I know)