Puhleeze

As soon as Gooly could understand Mahmee's words, and before he started demanding requesting for things, the word PLEASE has been carved in his membrane. Much to everyone's delight, the mini Gooly would walk around, with clasped hands (as though begging), with head slightly bowed, saying "piss" or "pish".

"Pish" when he wanted your bread.

"Piss" when he wanted the toy you were holding.

I think it is common to have parents insisting on, "Say please first" before passing the object in hand to a child. Some have even resorted to dubbing it THE MAGIC WORD, meaning:

1. if the child doesn't say the magic word, he/she will not get what he/she wants
2. as long as he/she says the magic word, he/she will get whatever he/she wants, including the last precious luncheon meat on the table Mahmee has been saving for her precious tea-sandwich

Sacre bleu! Is life so simple? Say please and you get the precious luncheon meat everything, anything you want? Nei jiau siong! (If only so simple/ You wish lah/Where got so easy?)

Thus not much later, I have to cruelly impart another life lesson to Gooly; say 'piss' all you want, you still MIGHT not get the luncheon meat it.

It's all rather confusing, I admit. And cruel. If Gooly spoke Cantonese, and has a nature like mine, he'd probably say, "Wan yeh ah?" (Is this a game?)

And yet the game continues. For instance, a while ago, I brought a plate of 6 butter cookies, and carefully explained about sharing and being fair; he gets 3, I get 3. Hey, be happy with 3. If it's luncheon meat, there's none for you.

Gooly munched, swallowed and char char dai dai came nearer to me.

"Who are these for?" pointing at MY cookies. "Mine," I roared.

"But.. but.. but... puhleeeese..."

I stuffed the cookie into my mouth. Bwahahahahah.

Welcome to the real world, Gooly. (Ish, after that I ganti balik with another type of cookie lar..Blek!)