Aiseh man..

Life exists for a reason. While some people think their life is dedicated to noble and heroic acts such as saving planet earth or protecting endangered species, right at the other end of the spectrum is a group of nincompoops whose sole existence on earth is to inject harsh remarks in their daily conversations, aimed to annoy, irritate, cause misery to the other conversant, for their own merryment.

For instance, exhibit A will say, "Wah, you so fat already!" to exhibit B, after a 15 seconds preamble of hellos. If exhibit B was Sawisekilo, who is well known to have a laser mouth (imagine her words lashed out from her mouth in neon lights), I'd say good luck to exhibit A.

Just the other day, a sub-species of the nasty kind commented, "Aiyo, why you cut your hair so short? You look so much better in long hair." Sawisekilo cleverly retorted, "My husband likes it so much."

Whooot! And thus, we should be prepared at all times for such ill remarks.

Example A: "You so fat already." This can be countered by saying, "Yes, this new diet finally worked for me."

Example B: "What is wrong with your face? So many pimples." Your retort could be, "Yalor, too much ginseng and abalone. Too heaty"

Never mind that they don't make sense because these nincompoops will never get it anyways. They will walk away in daze, not knowing what hit them. They will probably think of something to say, about 48 hours later. By then, we will be sipping coffee and devising yet another repartee. Whoot whoot wooray!