Sometime last month gooly had some loose change in his pocket, to be precise - 2 twenty cents coins. He came back from school and announced that a boy, hardly classified as a friend, had asked twenty cents from him because he was too poor, and because he really wanted it.
Gooly not knowing about hard earned money and lies and schemes but kindness and being helpful, departed with his money albeit reluctantly.
Apparently it's normal/ common for little children to loan, take, con, snatch, steal money from one another, all because 'I want it.'
This comes as a surprise to me because isn't it a basic rule that we teach our kids:
-do not steal or take things from others
-do not lie
...alongside with many other 'basics'? (I.e do not push gramma into river)
I know there are many life long lessons and some parents take the lessons light and easy. There are too many issues. Thus, They will only touch on the matter when the need arises. Say, when and after the son has stolen. And in later years, perhaps after the child dabble with drugs and is dancing with Lucy in the sky with diamonds?
It makes me wonder what do they talk to their children about, if not about how to be a good person? Is it always about getting the homework done?
I think lessons on building characters are not something we can impart with just one lecture. Like your child steals, you whack and kaotim, he won't do it ever again. It is through many conversations, examples and reiterations. There are hidden lessons everywhere as you observe how your child behaves and talks.
I remember correcting gooly when he started his requests with, ' I want...' or 'I like...'. Because when a child's demand is met because he likes it or he wants it, we are implanting the thoughts that he can have everything just because he wants it, and he likes it.
I said, it doesn't mean you can have it just because you want it...or like it. And this somehow is linked to the topic of stealing.
Also, since a baby, I never allowed him take home anything that doesn't belong to him, let it be a tattered toy or a minuscule train. Friends are always nice, they say...take..never mind, my son doesn't play with it anymore. But no..that's where they get the idea of taking home things that are not theirs.
I'm citing this example because I have seen little buggers taking toys from others though sheer crying or whining. Parents say will return it but they never do because..c'mon it's a bloody small train with a missing wheel.
But that's not the crux of the matter, is it?
That's what make little children steal...
Sounds like I can be the president of a country because I know why crimes happen. Teehee! Can I choose Finland?